Budapest Pride - Through the eyes of a brave friend

It has taken me a day to recover from the experience of being a part of the 13th Annual Budapest Pride. The local authorities as well as the Norwegian Embassy advised against participating in the annual event due to extreme risk of harm to the participants by the neo-Nazi assailants. As I sit in a small Internet cafe in Vienna, I recount Budapest Pride March this past Saturday, July 5th, 2008.

With just a few hours sleep, I awoke early to have breakfast with the 20 European Delegates participating in the Mr. Gay Europe Competition. Breakfast conversation was much lighter than the previous day but there still was a strong current of uncertainty to our own security regardless of participating in the parade or not. We had learned that the neo-Nazi hate web site has posted the delegations pictures on the site so their people could single them out in the upcoming attacks. I had very little appetite as I am still on edge. I made the decision not to allow fear to hold me prisoner but to harness this energy and stand up against intimidation.

I get myself organized and muster up the courage to head to the staging ground of the Parade at Deak Square. I arrived early 11AM (the march starts at 4PM) and already the police are getting organized and fencing to protect the route is already in place. There appears to be this calmness at Deak Square and it is business as usual. This alone, makes me feel a whole lot better. I wonder if the authorities were winding us up in hopes to deter people coming out, so they would have less people they needed to protect? I speak to a few people and they only seem to know that there is some "kind of protest march" happening later this afternoon. It appears it is no big deal. Again, I feel a bit better and not so terrified. I head back to the Ramada to meet my film crew and set up the first of our interviews for "Beyond Gay - The Politics of Pride" www.biggaymovie.com I now have a couple locations I want to film at and feeling good.

It is now 2PM and the film crew arrives. I learn that it is unlikely that they will stay with me during the Parade. They are still very afraid even with the extra security - word on the street is eggs (which is legal to through in Budapest) are rumored to be filled with acid. This is a huge concern! We start our interviews. I have the opportunity to interview Morten, President of Mr. Gay Europe, in front of the Holocaust Museum and we reflect on the last couple days and of what is anticipated to happen later today. The interview is quite somber - Morten fights back the tears. This is quite emotional.

We wrap our shooting near the Ramada and now time to head to Deak Square. The film crew pack us into a mini van and we scream down the side streets weaving in and out of traffic. I bring James, editor of G-scene in the UK with us. It is now 3PM and more people are collecting and the energy is building. We jump right into it and start interviewing random people. A Human Rights Researcher from New York, a straight older couple from Toronto, Amnesty International, a couple people from Budapest. It is now 3,30PM and we are told we need to get within the "cage area" as the gates will close at 3,50PM and we will be locked in. My film crew leaves me - I am alone. Inside the secured area and the document crew are on the other side of the fence. I panic just for a second as my mind drifts back to yesterday and seeing the images from the Holocaust Museum. Be strong I tell myself - I find James from the UK standing strong and determined next to me, as well as some other people I had interviewed earlier that day. I remind myself do not be intimidated, be strong and believe. I do a final on camera interview from within the cage as the camera crew pans back. The gates are opening and the Parade begins. No turning back - here we go.

Budapest Human Rights March Begins - Budapest Pride by the Numbers

1,500,000 €uros - Cost to secure Parade

10,000 Armed Police

3,000 neo-Nazi Protesters

thousands of liters of water - from water cannons to push back demonstrators

900 Marchers - 750 participants, 150 Press to cover the events and share with the world

45 arrests / detained protesters

36+ Dozen Rotten Eggs

20kg of rotten fruit & vegetables

8 reported injuries

7 Petro Bombs

4 Military Helicopters continually circling the city

2 Parade Floats

1 Hell of an Experience to remind you how fortunate we have the freedom to celebrate and embrace our diversity. A reminder that our fight is not over until all humans have equal rights.

The Experience

Marching towards Hero's Square within a caged route where there were not just one fence on either side but two fences! The police had in effect created a wall similar to the Berlin Wall where there was a "no man's land" between us the Marchers and the spectators / demonstrators. On the left side of us was a convoy of armoured trucks to act as a shield and to the right an army of police in riot gear. We feel safe and the march appears to be going well. 5 minutes into the march our first assault of eggs - you can feel the tension increase. Suddenly the stench of rotten eggs is sometimes over powering. We march on. 10 minutes into the march the first of several petro bombs land within the marchers - terror strikes for a split second, the police quickly move in and secure the route. We continue on. The sounds of the neo-Nazi protesters start their eerie chant and suddenly there is a shower of eggs, fruit, and rocks. We quickly move past the intersection and take cover. We move into a safe zone and regroup. 30 minutes into the march and we come to a dead stop. The police hold us here for about 40 minutes as they clear protesters ahead of us. Intelligence indicated the protesters had a shower of cobble stones planned for the marchers. The police used water cannons and tear gas to clear a safe route for us. Soon the marchers could feel for ourselves the effect of the tear gas and pepper spray - it is truly an unreal experience. I stand next to my "body guard" James as we both gasp for air and our eyes sting. Is this really happening? Suddenly another bomb is launched towards us.

We continue on getting closer to our destination of Hero's Square. Suddenly the situation gets worst, the police stop us again. The parade route falls back to plan "B" - we are re-routed through a secondary street. We continue on. Fire Crackers and Flares are shot towards us. Emergency vehicles race pass us. Suddenly one of the marchers attacks - he is identified as a neo-Nazi that somehow got past security at the start of the parade. The Flares must have been his signal. I duck behind James and just miss getting targeted with eggs - but a tomato manages to hit me. My adrenalin goes into overdrive. The police swoop in and suddenly a secondary wall surround the police and protestor as the media takes photos. It is a frenzy.

We are now just a few hundred meters away from our destination. We are stopped again, there are too many protesters ahead for the police to keep us safe. We are re-routed once again through a posh residential streets. I highly doubt this was part of the game route as our two floats narrowly squeeze down these streets and as we march by we set off car alarms of the cars that are parked on the streets. It feels so peaceful, as our music sings out, residence come to their front doors to see what is happening. You can well image the surprise on their faces as they see thousand of armed police escorting 900 marchers with rainbows. We are lead into a huge forested pen near the Square. We can see the protesters in the distance. They now see us - they come racing towards us. We are trapped! There is no escape route we now have to rely on the police to protect us. The air gets thick of Tear Gas the marchers race into the forest like deer with a pack of wolves closing in on them. For the first time on the march James and I are really terrified for our lives - there is no escape. What are we going to do? The police continue to push back the protesters with water, pepper spray and tear gas. We can see they are systematically clearing sections of the city making safe zones. James and I see our escape. We take control of our own fate and leave the secured area.

I cover my pride shirt as to not draw attention to myself as we slip into the crowd and make our way back to Deak Square. We are now safely away from the action forever changed as to what pride means. I am proud that I was able to march with our fellow Hungarians and the international press and supporters. We finally arrive back to the hotel and the MGE delegation do not have to ask how it went... they could tell by my face, I was alive and energized. Exhausted but thankful. I am a witness to the events that I can speak first hand and share with others to apply pressure to governments to continue to protect the rights of all humans.

A Friend's Experience In Eastern Europe

My heart is bounding and feels like it is going to break through my rib rage at any moment. My veins are bubbling with adrenalin and my fingers quiver at my keyboard. I sit in my hotel room at the Ramada Budapest as I try and collect my thoughts from the past couple days.

I was invited to be an International Judge to represent North America in the 2008 Mr. Gay Europe Competition as 20 young men from all across Europe compete for the title and honor to be the 2008/09 Gay Ambassador of this continent. I was excited to have this opportunity in helping choose that Ambassador who will take charge and lead his community in the year to come. I was excited to go to Eastern Europe and one of the gayest welcoming Eastern European cities – Budapest. I was also thrilled to learn that we, Mr. Gay Europe, would be marching in the 13^th annual gay pride parade to celebrate how far we have come in winning more equality and breaking down the negative stereo types. This is how I felt a mere three days ago (July 1^st – Canada Day).

July 2^nd had my first meeting with the organizers of Mr. Gay Europe – Tore & Morten both from Norway. They welcomed me with open arms and were very excited to see me. I arrived late in the afternoon – six hours late as my initial flight in the morning was cancelled due to Lufthansa Airlines doing a rotating strike. I saw in their faces that they were stressed, but only thought it was because I was not on my intended flight and their driver could not locate me. I later learned that my delayed flight was the least of their concern.

July 3^rd I write an email to my dear friend Ken who has just recently come back from Moscow Pride. A Pride that was "intense" and knew that he would be able to understand what I was about to say. I wrote, "Just have to tell you.... I am totally freaked out about the parade this coming weekend. We had an unexpected visit by the Ambassador of Norway (Mr. Gay Europe is a registered company in Norway) and they are very concerned about our participation in the parade and are advising us not to participate. It sounds like it could be really bad. The film crews I have been in touch with are starting to have second thoughts as well. It is quite emotional. Everyone is freaked out. I do not think I was really prepared for this battle!"

I have to stop as my eyes start to well up with tears. I am having such crazy emotions. I am not an emotional person. I cannot believe my eyes are tearing and my nose is running like Shannon Falls in the spring. I went on to say, "To put it into context.... we are advised to wear full body armor and helmets and have umbrellas to keep the eggs and other shit off of us. This is totally insane. The Ambassador asked me what will happen to Mr. Gay Canada or GayWhistler if I get seriously hurt. How will that serve my local community? Is this the battle you want to wage at this time - or is there another battle you can prepare for? Such heavy thoughts." I send off the email and go to bed… my body tweaking with nervous energy like I have never experienced before.

July 4^th (today) with just a few hours sleep I spring awake and prepare to meet the 20 delegates of Mr. Gay Europe. The organizers want me to share the trailer of "Beyond Gay – the Politics of Pride" so they can have a better understanding of what Saturday's parade may look like. We all enjoy breakfast together and then I play the video – the room grows silent as the delegation watches intently. Some of the delegates feel sick to their stomachs as they had no idea that places like Belarus and Moscow have it so bad. It was a fascinating experience to see these young men come alive and get clarity as to why they have assembled here in Budapest, to be Mr. Gay Europe takes on a clearly meaning for many of them. There is a plethora of emotions of wanting to march and stand by their Hungarian brothers & sisters to support and be strong in solidarity with them and at the same time terrified – real terror of what will happen. I leave the delegation and head off to the next venue and have a Judges meeting on today's interview rounds. An hour later we welcome the delegates for 5 minute interviews and many were still reeling from the video that had just seen. The competition has changed.

I have some down time and take in the Holocaust Museum – what was I thinking?! As I walked through the facility I kept thinking it is so easy to replace the word "Jew" for "Gay" – is this really happening? I head down to one of the Budapest Public Baths to try and regroup in the energizing mineral baths.

At 6PM I meet with Tore, Executive Producer of MGE and he informs me that the film crew has pulled out as they are fearful of Saturday's event. Intelligence is suggesting that there will be over 3,000 anti-gay protestors ready to "crush and destroy the fags." Desire Dubounet, a local Trans Celebrity sends a message to Adam the local producer of the event and they are mobilizing their own body guards to help protect us in addition to the already 400 police officers assigned to protect Mr. Gay Europe, plus another 1,000 armed forces to protect the parade. The local group sees the importance of documenting these events and sharing with the world in hopes that this will some how make a difference and stop these fascists. If it is not the Gays then who is next? The film project is back on.

6.35PM Tore gets a call from Interpol to reconfirm their earlier conversation that the MGE Grand Finale at Coca Cabana is a legitimate target. The local Budapest police are unable to confirm if they will have enough resources to keep the delegation and guests safe. The situation is way more volatile and dangerous than we had anticipated. The local producers have been spending all afternoon making new plans and at 7.40PM the organizers make the difficult decision and cancel the Grand Finale at Coca Cabana. Instead we will have to post it to a new secret location and will have to be very careful on how the information is shared. The organizers inform the group – the thunder of everyone's hearts pounding against their rib cages was deafening. What is supposed to be an exciting and fun event has turned extremely serious. The intelligence MGE has been able to gather indicate that this could be more than just violent, but could in reality get deadly. The local news reports on the parade route but refer to it as the anticipated "battle ground – a blood bath." We are told to walk in groups and never walk the same route twice when coming and going from the nearby venues. The stress-o-meter is well into the red line by now. Walking back to the hotel with some of the delegates the conversation is very somber, tears are streaming from our faces – the war has begun. Pride has taken on a new meaning for all of us. We cannot be complacent, we cannot sit ideal, we must be strong, we must be determined and we must act smart. We are 12 hours away from what will be no doubt a life altering event – we already are feeling the effects.

Yours in Pride,

Dean Nelson – Director, Vancouver Pride; Executive Director Mr. Gay Canada

Budapest, Hungary

July 4, 2008

Living a Blessed Life - Reflections of Warsaw Pride

When I first arrived in Warsaw I was not sure what to expect. Having recently been in Sao Paulo where the Pride was more than 3 million strong and completely an open celebration to Moscow where the Pride was a covert action of secrecy. So, now we are in Warsaw.

We arrive late Tuesday night and are met by Tomasz Baczkowski, the founder and leader of Fundacja Rownosci, an organization that supports the human rights of the GBLT community here in Warsaw as well as organizing the yearly Pride events for since they started a few years ago. He takes us to the apartments we will be staying in and then we head down town to see the office where all the action happens. When we arrive there a few people busily working and we are politely introduced. Most speak very good English to our relief. We are hungry and tired so Tomasz decides he will take us to a restaurant for some food. The place he takes us to is closed and so he suggests an alternative. Although we have been looking forward to perogies and sausage we end up going to a Chinese restaurant that is run completely by Vietnamese people. So not only is it amusing to be having Chinese food made by Vietnamese people in Poland, but we need Tomasz to help translate the items to us from Polish and then he orders but the waiter’s Polish is not very good either. But ultimately the food is good. We head back to our place and crash for the night.

The next day we wake up. We are staying at Tomasz’ flat and Josh has slept on the fold out couch. When he wakes up his shoulder is very sore, but he thinks it will be okay so we head out. We grab a taxi and head to the office. When we arrive there is a flurry of activity and we try to stay out of everyone’s way and finally decide to go for a walk and see what the city has to offer. We take a short but interesting walk around and take in some of the sights of Warsaw. Josh’s shoulder is getting worse so we decide to find a doctor to send him to and get him some help. He goes off to do that with Bob and Morris and I return to their flat. Eventually, Bob and Josh get back. Josh’s arm is in a sling and he finally has a smile on his face that has not been there the whole day that says the doctor has given him some drugs to take away the pain.

Neither of our flats have a wireless internet connection and it is driving us crazy. The only internet connection we have access to is at the office so we are anxious to get there whenever we can. That night we head for a traditional dinner at a restaurant that has been recommended to us. The place is packed and we get a table and I am in charge of ordering. I order some perogies and some meat trays. The perogies come and they are exactly what we expected, the meat tray comes and it is a round chopping board that is heaped with about 10 pounds of various meats and sausages. And then the smaller tray also comes with more meat and then another with some cheeses and fruit. We do our best but do not even come close to finishing the food. We go back to the office for one last visit and use of the internet. I ask what time we can come in the morning to use the computers and we are told someone would be there at 8am. We think great!

The next morning we arrive at the office at 9am and the door is locked so we ring the bell. Conrad, who is the parade director, shows up at the door half asleep and tells us that everyone is still sleeping and that we should come back later. I ask if I can grab my computer, thinking I can sit on the steps outside and get the signal and he allows me to come into the office. The room is dark and people are sleeping everywhere in the office. On the floor, on the couches, the whole team plus some extra helpers have been there until late in the evening working and have finally crashed. The team is working hard on the two big upcoming events, the Gala Night on Friday and the parade on Saturday. We want to help, but as our Polish is very weak there is not much we can do. However, we find out that one of the award recipients on Friday cannot make the event and we are asked if we can do a short video of the people receiving the award and we are happy to oblige.

Friday night’s Gala is a wonderful affair, lots of people, some who are very famous in Poland as well as great food and wine. We chat to a few people and then go into the theatre where we watch an old silent movie that is played to some live cello music that is absolutely amazing. Some awards are given out and unfortunately all in Polish so we clap when everyone else does and laugh with the crowd as well. There is live music by some well-known Polish musicians and singers and the evening goes very well. But you can see on the faces of the organizers that as much as they are enjoying the night, their thoughts are still on the following day and the challenges still not over come.

We have been told earlier in the week that though the Police are mandated to protect the marchers they are always looking for ways to hinder the parade. Back in 2005 when the parade had been banned, Tomasz led the way and took the Polish government to court and won the right to have the parade. What was most dramatic is that this not only affected their parade but is a ruling that now ensures that any group, even the nationalist and skinhead groups, who want to have a parade are protected to does so and are mandated by the government to have police protection at no cost to the organization. But, as already stated, the police are always looking for ways to make it challenging. This year, they have imposed an old law, dating back from the war times, that state that moving people on flat beds is illegal and therefore the flatbeds (floats) that are going to used in the parade can not move while people are on them. Not much fun. The whole week, the team has been trying to find a way to fix this. Their first thought is that they would have people dance on the trucks, remove them all, and then drive the trucks 100 metres, and then load up the trucks again and stop while everyone has a dance. Yikes! But in the 11^th hour, Tomasz does some research on the internet and finds an old court ruling where the law that was being used had been previously, successfully challenged. So, phone calls are made, people are consulted and literally minutes before the parade, Tomasz and associates sit with the city and police and come to a decision, that in fact the floats could have people on the back and dancing to celebrate Pride. Chalk another point up for Tomasz and Fundacja Rownosci!

While all this is going on we are at the office getting ourselves ready. We are going to march in the Warsaw Parade with our Vancouver Pride Society banner and the Canadian Flag! We know that his will be an interesting Parade, as there will be an actual parade, but there will still be a large amount of protestors. When we arrive at City Hall, the starting point, there are already some floats there and lots of people. The one thing we notice is that there is a huge presence of police, some in normal uniform and many in riot gear. We can quickly see that some of the persons gathering are the protestors, nationalists and skinheads gathering directly in front of where we are standing. The feeling of fear is becoming very strong as they seem to quickly grow, then as quickly as they seem to gather, the police start ushering them away to across the street. As they are moving past we see that one of our camera people has joined the group as a covert operator. He gives a very coy wink and moves with the crowd of protestors to the spot where police who had linked arms to create a barrier contained them.

We are wondering the starting area and still see some people who are there to protest. The laws in Poland say that as long as there are not more than 14 people gathered to protest it cannot be deemed illegal. One woman walks through the crowd of parade people holding a sign in front of her face that translate to say “You are the reason there are child molesters” and others are handing out pamphlets about the Christian view on homosexuality in both Polish and English.

Lola and I take one and she tries the candy and quickly spits it out, as it is not very good candy. We read some of the pamphlet and put it away to later peruse. We are approached again by one of the people offering us the pamphlet who seems to speak very good English. I say that we have a pamphlet already and that the candy is horrible and jokingly tell him that if he wants to try and convince me to become straight they should get better candy. Then he goes into the sharing of the “message”. I try to be respectful and finally ask him if he is a true disciple of Jesus. He proudly announces yes. I then ask him if he knows the story of when Jesus stopped the crowd from stoning a woman to death and says “Let he among you who have no sin throw the first stone”. He quickly agrees and says he is not there to throw stones. I then point out the group across the street who were there to figuratively “throw stones” and ask why he is not over there and preaching to them. His only answer is to keep coming back to me, and my “sin”. I agree to listen to him more if he would agree to go over and speak to the other group. I do not need to tell you what he did. I told him that the one thing I did know about Jesus is he is full of love, quick like the few thousand people who had gathered to celebrate Pride, and he did not endure hate, like our friends across the street and asked my new “friend” to really consider what was really the worse sin. Then offered to give him a hug which caused an expression on his face that made me smile and then said good bye, as I gaily walked through the crowd of happy, loving people, proudly waving my Canadian flag.

Finally, the engines start and the floats start moving. There more police around us as well as the police who are holding back the protestors that we are now marching directly pass. They have banners with things written and are shouting slogans, which I do not understand. I can only assume they are the usual derogatory statements that try and always unsuccessfully wager support from the public. We were later told that over the past 4 years, the groups of protestors continues to get smaller and smaller as the Pride marchers continues to grow. It takes me back to the church lady who always walked around the Vancouver Parade site for as many years as people could remember with Christian slogans of antigay nature and was such a regular appearance that people in the parade started to parody her. It has been years since she has been seen. I often wonder is she just became too old to continue, or too discouraged by the lack of change she thought she could affect.

We are marching with a group of people and are constantly bombarded with people who want to get our picture. The VPS banner and the Canadian flag. Some are press and many are just others who are so proud to see support from so far away. I have never been as proud to be a Canadian Gay Man. But we are not the only visitors. Among others who have travelled from Germany, Amsterdam and the Ukraine, to name a few places, we meet a woman who has the most energy I think I have ever seen in one human being. She has come from her home of England via Riga, where she attended their Pride the weekend before and convinced the British embassy to fly the Pride Flag on the weekend of Pride as an action of solidarity with the Pride organizers in Riga. Her mission in Warsaw was to accomplish the same, and as we walked past the British embassy on the Parade route we saw a flurry of excitement occurring, as everyone was delighted to see the Rainbow flag hanging proudly in front of the embassy.

All the while we are travelling down the parade route there are police at every street junction and a constant ring round us to protect us. Their mandate to protect us is so strong that they would not even let Lola go outside of the parade group to get water. We realize that their concern is valid as there are protestors at every turn, being held back by police. We later learn that there had been some incidences of violence and see some protestors actually being arrested and taken away to police vans. But there is nothing that will deter this group to continue dancing, celebrating and marching for what is right.

The whole time I was marching in the parade I could not help but having two constant thoughts. One is that I was participating in a part of history. The same kind of history that was created by the brave people in our own community that marched down the streets of Vancouver some 30 years ago. There was no crowds cheering, but instead throwing things, and each and everyone had to consider that they were putting their personal safety and privacy at risk.

Those who know me would not be surprised to hear that I was teary eyed for most of the march. I kept thinking two thoughts. How blessed am I! Blessed to be able to be here in Warsaw and standing with courageous people who are fighting a fight that had already been fought for me so many years ago. Blessed also that I live in a country, a city and a community that has so many rights and privileges for our community. I am not so naïve to think that there is still not much to be done that I can be a part of, but this experience only makes me more determined to work and stand for the things that I know are right. It is my duty and my privilege to be a part of this change, both at home and around the world. And for this I can truly say I am Living a Blessed Life.

First Successful Pride March in Moscow!!!

Hello all! First let me say we are all safe and sound here in Moscow and are all filled with a sense of extreme honor to have been a part of the first actual Pride March here in Moscow. The experience we had was one that none of us will ever forget, including our dear straight cameraman Josh Rainhard. In order to help you all understand what this experience was like I will take you all back to Friday.

On Friday we were anxiously trying to get in touch with Nikolai to find out what the plan was for the weekend. He had already shared with us the fact that no decision had been made officially as to when they would assemble to have the annual attempt of Pride in Moscow. This was to help ensure that what they did would not give any of the anti-gay groups too much opportunity to counter-assemble against us. We were told that there would be a meeting on Saturday that would explain the plans for the Sunday and we could attend that meeting. In order to maintain a level of secrecy, we would be given a call on Saturday to be told the location on the meeting. So the adventure begins.

Before this however, we were invited to the Canadian Embassy here in Moscow, as the Ambassador is a personal friend of one of the team, Morris Chapdelaine. It was an amazing affair and the four of us, myself, Morris, Josh, and Bob Christie our director and leader were able to dine with some other guests such as Nikolai and some of his associates from the Pride Moscow team and some other Russian guests from human rights groups and media. It was definitely the calm before the storm, so to speak.

On Saturday, we were contacted about 3pm and told that the meeting was happening and given a landmark to go to and told to call again once we reached that location. After we did were given an address and it was an apartment of someone who cannot be mentioned for safety reasons and we headed forward. When we arrived it was a large building complex and we were told to say to the guard at the gate that we were going to a "birthday party". By the way, there are police of various levels and guards everywhere in Moscow. We arrived at the apartment and invited in to join a group of people of men and women of various ages who were all speaking in Russian. Our host, who I will say nothing more than the fact that she was a wonderful person and it was a pleasure to meet her, also spoke English. So she brought us in and started to translate information for us as the official part of the meeting started. The short of the meeting was that the decision had been made this year to try and create a positive event instead of the traditional violent gathering of the previous two years. So, though the website officially listed the City hall as the gathering place for the event, it was not where we were going to meet. I should mention at this point that the city government here denied all of the approximately 150 applications that were made to have a gathering. As Nikolai spoke to his team I watched as they were all listening with a sense of excitement and commitment to this cause. What was shared with us was this, Nikolai said that though he trusted everyone one on the team completely, to ensure a successful execution, he would not share the actual meeting spot to any of them. There were a couple of people on the team who knew what that plan was and they needed to trust them. All we were told is the Metro station to meet at and the time. We were told that when we arrived there to wait until someone contacted us and take us to the meeting place. We were to go in no more than twos or threes and not to acknowledge each other when we arrived. After meeting a few people we left, excited and anxious for the next day.

Sunday morning we woke up and met our Russian translator that we had hired, Vladimir and Graham and Lola. Graham is a previous employee of Transmission, which is the production company that is backing this project. Lola is his girlfriend who is studying in Europe and they came to meet us in Moscow to help with the documentation of this event. The decision had been made to split into two groups, Bob, Josh, Vladimir and myself will go to the secret meeting spot to attend the actual event and Morris, Graham and Lola would go to City Hall to the 'public' event that would most likely attract many anti-gay and hate groups to try and stop the event. We headed from our hotel and went downtown, wished each other good luck and went to our secret meeting spot.

I was on the wireless microphone, so Josh could hear anything I said so the decision to split into couples was made, Bob and I and Josh and Vladimir. We got off of the subway onto a platform and immediately recognized one of the other organizers. We walked past him with out acknowledging him and walked into the platform of the station. We then also saw a couple of others, all alone and not acknowledging each other. We were not sure what to do and have to say our hearts were all racing. There were 4 police walking the platform, though this was not necessarily unusual, as I have said police are everywhere here. Though when one of them stop and spoke to one of the organizers our hearts started racing. We kept trying to look like dumb tourists and looking at our Subway map hoping we just looked lost. As we stood there, another dozen or more police appeared on the metro platform. Just as our panic seemed too much to handle, one of the group approached us and said to follow him, and we happily did. Once outside he explained we were going to a café and that we would wait there till the appropriate time. We arrived at the café, which was next to the Tchiackovsky Conservatory. This place was chosen as it was a beautiful serene spot and also that Tchiackovsky is one of the most famous Russian composers and well known as a gay man. As we sat in the café sipping our cappuccinos we were in constant contact with our other group by text message and listened to them talk as media and protestors started to gather as time went on. It is important to mention that a handful of media were chosen by Nikolai and brought to the real event with him.

As the time got closer, we recognized other couples in the café as people who were from the meeting the day before and also saw others, hanging out on the street and the sidewalk. All anxiously waiting for the signal to go and gather in front of the building. The woman who was given the task as the key person was actually sitting right behind us. As the time got closer, the anticipation grew. Then, finally, we saw her answer her phone, she got up and started to move and then the rest of us followed. In what seemed like a split second, there was assembled a group of 15- 20 people. The Moscow Pride banner came out as well as a bunch of Pride Flags. Nikolai appeared as though from nowhere with a contingent of media and press in tow. He spoke and led the team in chants of protest and celebration. And then came the moment that Nikolai and his team had dreamed of for so long, WE MARCHED. It might have only been for a short distance (not even a whole city block), but none the less, we marched. No one to stop us, no protestors, no police, no hate. I must share that the feeling that emanated from the group was tangible. A sense of freedom, a sense of success, a sense of true PRIDE! Then as quickly as it began, it ended. People gathered the flags and banners and put them into plastic bags and dispersed as quickly as we had gathered.

After gathering ourselves, we decided to go to the other event to see what was happening and how our other crew had made out. Our concern was growing, as we had not heard from them for a while. We arrived to city hall to see groups of people gathered. Groups of Orthodox Priest and Nuns with symbols of religion as well as Nationalists and skinheads and some who looked the guy or girl next door. We cautiously approached the group and I have to say I had never felt so fearful in my life. The level of tension and hate was tangible and I wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible. We spotted our friends and Bob ran to them in the midst of a group to try and gather them. Expecting that they would follow quickly, Josh and I moved quickly to the prearranged post meeting spot. As time passed and we had not seen the rest of the group, the anxiety started again.

After a short time, Morris and Bob appeared. It was obvious that something had happened as they were visibly shaken. They shared with us that they had been seen talking to someone from the Gay Activist group and as a group attacked one gay man, Bob was jumped from behind. Morris quickly grabbed the guy who then swung and punched Morris in the nose. (You should all know that this was also Morris' birthday). They then realized that they had to get out and left as quickly as possible, unable to communicate with Graham and Lola. Shortly after, Graham and Lola arrived and we all sighed a huge relief. What they had witnessed was a Moscow Pride Banner being hung from an apartment beside city hall by some of the protestors. Nikolai and his group had strategically planned and rented a flat in the building a few months before just for the purpose of hanging this banner. The banner only hung for a short while before it was targeted with eggs and eventually torn down.

The sad part is the four men in the apartment were now stranded there. We learned this later in the evening as we gathered again with the Pride group to celebrate their success of the day. The feeling of joy that was in the room, including the man who was covered in bruises and a few band aids from being beaten was also mixed with the anxiety as some of the group tried to find a lawyer to help successfully get the men out of the apartment where they were being held and had the electricity cut. These men were eventually arrested but then released and there seems to be no overt violations of their human rights.

I will close this with a personal comment. I am still welled up with tears as I relive these events in my head. I have never felt such a sense of humility as I did this day. As I personally work on the events of our own Pride, I think I may never have the feeling I had with my Muscovite friends, when for the first time ever, they marched with Pride in the streets of Moscow!

Humbly,
Yours in Pride,

Ken Coolen
Treasurer
Parade Committee Chair
Fund Raising Committee Chair
Vancouver Pride Society